Burned. What to Do When Even Your Teachers Laugh at You

A few weeks ago I was visiting the blogs that I follow, which I don't do as often as I should. One of the posts was about a crit class where this girl felt cheated because the praise she was receiving wasn't deserved... or so she thought. We banded together claiming we rather hear a blunt truth with a nice "I know you can do better", than an undeserved compliment.

Well, I got my wish, alright.

For the past seven weeks I've attended my first ever Creative Writing class at my local college. The first class was kind of odd because everyone writes more literary stuff and there I was, just spilling blood and guts everywhere... Right. Not the warm reception I was expecting, but alright. With every week I learned to tone down the horror and they learned more of my style. I really enjoy the class and it is challenging me to explore different areas of my creativity.

Now, because I know my style isn't really their thing but keep getting rave comments anyway, I suspected they would always find something nice to say, no matter how bad I sucked. Which was kind of disappointing, but I get it. This is a class targeted to weekend writers, not to people actively pursuing a life as a full time writer. As such, the teacher is more lenient and doesn't try to squeeze out of us a master piece by the end of the course. The one positive is that it gives you the sense of a 'safe environment' to try and experiment in other literary forms or genres.

So, I did just that. I presented a 'poem' to the class. Did I tell you I know nothing of poetry? Yeah, and I mean NOTHING. I didn't study English in school because in Mexico they teach Latin-American Literature. Aside from rhythm and rime, there is nothing in common between Sor Juana Ines de la Cruz and Frost, which I should have taken as the first warning against trying it. But I'm an idiot, and what's worse, I was ignorant. And that is a bad combination.

I knew my 'poem' wasn't good but I thought I'd take the chance to learn something new, and learn I did. First I learned that that silence can be very loud. I also learned that my teacher is very much capable of annihilate your piece, burn your soul, and eat your heart without so much as a blink.

The first thing that happened after the silence was my teacher thoughtfully commenting on how the piece was not a poem, but prose with a few words that rhymed. It needed to be chopped and trimmed a whole lot. Which was true and, though it hurt, I understood. Then she laughed at my 'naiveté'. The pseudo-poem was about my kids and how much I hoped they remembered me forever. It seems that sentiment is cute but unrealistic, and worthy of a space in a shelf next to Santa Clause or the Easter Bunny.

Yeah, she laughed. OUCH

After the shock, the group took my side. Clearly unhappy with her way of putting down my feelings, the group opted to say nice things like they got the feeling behind it, or that they thought it was good for a first try. Another girl went so far as to say she would try my way to write a first poem, going from wordy to trimmer by editing. The teacher tried to coax me to rhyme right there and then, which I simply couldn't do. Not only was I too embarrassed and feeling inadequate, but there's also the fact that I knew nothing of Iambic Pentameters, or whatever the hell she was saying. So the class went on to read another person's work and the teacher told me she expected a re-write of my poem by mail in the course of the week.

I got home, kinda told something to my hubby, and shed a couple of tears. Then I started reading about meters, rhyming, rhythm, and what the fuck was an Iambic Pentameter. I'm way far from knowing everything there is about poetry, but sure as hell I learned more today than I did while I wrote that thing. I don't condone the laughter but I totally understand that I have to study more before attempting a style. I'm hell-bent on getting the best out of the situation, and though I won't be reading the new version to the class, I'll send it to my teacher and I'll try to squeeze whatever knowledge I can of her in the small amount of time I have left.

So, my message is this: Blunt criticism is very hard to take and the fact that you think you're ready for it, doesn't make it any easier. It is, however, one of the best opportunities you'll have to grow. Take it, learn from your mistakes, and don't loose faith in yourself. You may suck at 'x' now, but with every time you try, with every question you ask, with every burn you take, you know more. One day you will be just as good as the one who burned you.

Enjoy your weekend!

How to Deal With a Bad Review, Revisited

This is a question I constantly find plastered all over writer's boards and Facebook groups. Every writer with a book, story, or any kind of written piece out there to be read, is subject sooner or later to negative feedback. It can be a post on your blog or the brain child in which you worked relentlessly for years until it was published. It doesn't matter if we published it ourselves, if it was traditionally published, or if we hit the publish button to the blogosphere. We mean each word we put into those blank pages and, in some measure, a bit of us is exposed with them. That's why we want so much for others to enjoy our work, to like it, to find something special about it. And even though in this business we know we should eat rejection for breakfast, it is easier said than done.

When I got my first bad review it wasn't easy. I felt a punch in my gut and physical pain I thought reserved for ... well, physical injuries. Of course I got mad at the reviewer for what I considered her unnecessary rudeness, but I got over it. Life went on and my book continued to be read. I've gotten a few very positive reviews after that one. I've also gotten a couple more bad ones, however I don't fret over them anymore.

As a reader and reviewer, I understand there are a lot of books out there that are not for me. Either they go into themes I do not enjoy, their characters have characteristics I find annoying, or they are simply bad quality stories. However the case, it is hard to choose books among the sea of options Amazon offers us. How do I do it? I read the reviews left there. First I check how many reviews the book has. More than ten give me more reason to believe in the story. However, if all of them are positive, I tend to distrust the book. How is it possible everyone likes this book? I mean, Anna Karenina has detractors, for goodness sake. It simply can't be that a book written by this totally unknown author has managed what no other writer in the history of the written word has ever achieved: Perfection. And not only perfection, but a consensus of perfection. Impossible. So I go on and choose another book.

My point here is: A negative review is not bad per se. It lends credit to the rest of your reviews and to yourself. A balance between good and bad is what you should aim for. Think two out of ten reviews, or five out twenty. Human taste is impossible to predict and homogenize and such should be your reviews. Variety is key. A few three-stars, and a couple of one-stars among many four/five-stars will scream "Legit" to a knowledgeable reader.

So what to do when the bad ones come?

There are two main things you can do. Either ignore them, or (when particularly outlandish or ridiculous) talk about them. Remember the old adagio: There is no such thing as bad publicity. If you can laugh about it without sounding snarky, go for it. The worst that can happen is that others will be intrigued about that story/author everybody is talking about.

Be careful, though. One thing is to poke fun at your book and the reactions it is getting out of people, and laughing about people. Your readers deserve respect, even when they are not nice to you, and if you cross that invisible line there, it will turn its ugly face at you and bite you in the ass. Ferociously.

So, go on. Be happy. The most important thing you have to remember is to have faith in yourself. As long as you are being the best that you can be today, you are on top of the world. You'll get better, and if you get really better, millions will hate you. Ask JK Rowling or Stephen King.

Full Disclosure Policy, My First Bad Review

When I signed on to write about my adventurous road into becoming a published writer I said I'll abide by a full disclosure policy in an attempt to help any newbie author fellow out there to the best of my abilities. It's very easy to share when all you have to say are good things and small victories, but sharing failures or tough experiences can be a little more challenging.

Be that as it may, I'm here to tell you all about my first truly bad review, how I reacted, and what I've learned from it.

We all know reviews are the most important tool small names like mine have to sell a book. When nobody knows who the hell you are, convincing them to pony up ten bucks for your book has to be done in resourceful ways, like having other people reviewing it. Now, a true author that believes in his/her work won't resort to shady deals paying for only good reviews; no, we go out there and ask people to read and share what they really think about our stories. It is here that lies the inherent risk of someone saying bad things about your book because not everyone will be pleased.

When I started in this business, as I mentioned in another entry, I bought a "Writing a Novel for Dummies" kind of book and one of the first phrases that caught my eyes said: 'If you want to work as a writer you have to get used to rejection. You have to have rejection for breakfast!!' And I did, or so I thought. The real proof comes along with the first harsh words you receive and how you handle yourself after them.

The reviewer in my case was a bit harsh and even mean, but that might be just touchy me. In any case, when I read it my heart sank and I felt sad; I though about a thank you note but didn't know what to say, so I just closed my computer and took a break. While I was cooking I kept thinking what to do and one hour later I wasn't feeling all that sad anymore, a little disappointed maybe, but I understood this was bound to happen sooner or later and I recognized this woman had made some good points.

I came back to the computer and wrote that note. I said how I thank her for taking the time to read my book and how sorry I was she didn't like it, then I acknowledge some mistakes had been made when editing the story and assured her we were now in the process of correcting them. I closed my note telling her I wished this bad experience didn't deter her from reading any future work of mine and said bye. Minutes later, I noticed another new review from a different person who gave me three stars instead of one and that just closed the deal for me.

I was very surprised at how good I felt after hitting the send button, it was liberating! All in all, I think that I raised to the challenge and am now much better prepared to when the next one comes; it being for this book or any future one.

Well boys and girls, that's the story, I hope it helps you to deal with your own sense of rejection, or at least that it entertains you. I'll see you around and remember, the most important advise I can give you is KEEP WRITING and BELIEVE IN YOURSELF.